havent posted for a long time.. whatever. didnt feel like blogging for the past few weeks. its just that suddenly felt emotional so decided to blog about it since i cant tell anyone face to face about it..
well..i realize that im not a good friend. i always throw my friends aside just to fit into the crowd.. and now that i've lost my true friends..i finally know how painful it is.. no use regretting now, right? only have my silly self to blame..
can i reverse time? i would want to go back to days of 2K, whr im super close to my friends..and not like now..all in different worlds, immersed in our own things..too busy to care about each other..am i allowed to cry after all the selfish things i've done..?i think not..
and now, i realize that they can actually do without me..just the 2 of them on their own..how should i feel..?happy because i can finally fit in without bothering so much? or sad and regretful that i've comitted a sin of abandoning my closest sisters..?i don't know..
right now..all my heart feels of is regret..regrets of not hanging out with them more often..regrets of throwing them aside..regrets of not treasuring them..
even if we meet now..we do not share common topics of conversations..instead they converse among themselves much better, without me butting in..
i only have myself to blame for this ending..and this, is how horrible i am. go ahead and scold me.i truly deserve it.
and to them, sorry.
eileen
she Y him at 10:40 PM
Monday, March 16, 2009
HELLO PEOPLE.I AM STILL ALIVE AND KICKING. DO NOT ASSUME THAT I AM DEAD.THANK YOU.
lols. i do not know what to post. talking to jingyi on the phone now. she is screaming her head off because mr teo told us that the ASK was supposed to be handed in on monday but in actual fact is due yesterday. so she did not manage to hand it in and is very angry now. my ears are bleeding because she screamed too much.
LOL. school hols now. got a shitload of homework to complete. irritating teachers. whatever. heh i think that others are v shuang la. i still have to work la...tmr still got traning..should i go for class outing?lols no la no la. obviously going la..but like v little ppl going leh..
i dont feel like typing snymore..maybe leter when i feel like it i will post some random pictures..hmms.
thats all for now. ciao eileen
she Y him at 9:48 PM
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